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A Letter to my Mother:Why I started blogging


Two years,3 months, and 12 days its the number that keeps going through my head. Two years I was senior at The Evergreen State College.This was a liberal arts school known more for its pseudo hippisism than its academics but I learned a lot.In June of that year I was in knee deep in finals.I was taking a full course of statistics,children's literature,and child psychology.While at the same time working part time as a Secretary at my mothers veterinary clinic.I was also staving of another bout of flu that came from a combination of living on campus and my weakened immune system due to my spinal bifida.Needless to say I was swamped.
Yep swamped and you know what they say it rains it pours.Two weeks before I am supposed to the last set of finals of my undergraduate career.My Aunt took my on a three trip to New Orleans.While on trip my alcoholic mother calls on my birthday no less to tell me that the man who became the main father figure in my life succumbed to pancreas cancer.Unfortunately she waited until the funeral to tell me the news(yay mom,not). I was devastated.Within the next two weeks I lost my uncle,my cousin and one of my childhood friends.I lost the ability to focus on school,study,or even hold conversations.I was a mess.
Because of my odd behavior the people in charge of state disability scholarship paid me a visit the day before my graduation ceremony apparently my grades had been slipping so bad that getting my degree was now in question and so was the money to pay for it.This led them to look into other options when they looked at my social security they found the last and final bullet in the emotional gun.My check had been going into a joint account that I had with my mother who for the last few years had been taking out more than half the checks for at least year.So here I was dealing with my future and the multiple deaths of those around me I had to come to with the fact that my mother had betrayed me to fund her alcohol habit.
I spent the night in the arms of my best friend crying my eyes and trying my best improve my spirits so that I could walk across the stage and graduate with the rest of my class( they let you walk if you are within 6 credits of the graduation limit)The next day I dusted myself off and faced the day .In had lost my scholarship due to lack of grades.The state pulled my SSI check because my mother was committing fraud by taking my cash and using it as her own.My mother refused to let me come home due the fact that she was be audited and our small community learned about the abuse she inflicted and the alcohol that caused it.In one week I lost my source of income,and my mother. It has been two years ,3 months ,and 12 days since I have seen my mother After several months of homelessness,living on friends couches and therapy I have finally gotten on my feet again.And thanks to the new site I found a new community of people to talk to and a way to earn money that is mine and mine alone.A lot can happen in a short period of time only god only knows maybe I will look back two years ,three months,and and 12 days from now and only the good times..It may not be the fairytale life but for now it will have to do

marthapreston4

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