You know the pedantic guy who loves to sniff his luxury wine and comment in a nasally voice about the region it was grown in, and the quality of the grape? The same guy whom you’d pay money to see loosen up a bit, but he never seems to finish that glass? Well my suggestion is that you invite him to the Somma Wine Spa in Los Cabos, Mexico. Not only will you love it, but it’s also practically guaranteed that he will arise from the experience with a little more amiability, like a beautiful phoenix out of the ashes.
The spa is based on the rejuvenating properties (including magic antioxidants) found in that bacchanal delight, the grape. The spa promises that “the wine-making method can be mirrored in all stages of the therapeutic and relaxation process.” Even down to the dark wood floors which will probably suggest to your subconscious that you are in a wine barrel (apparently a desirable position to be in, as you are encouraged to be the grape).
The Resort cleverly derives its name not only from the Greek word for body, but also from the French word for wine waiter, a fun fact that the pretentious gentleman you invited will love regurgitating in the future. Appropriately, you and your ostentatious friend will be attended to by your own Sommeliers, who will help you choose, not only the right wine to compliment your body treatments, but will also assist you in choosing those treatments based on your personal needs.
So as things start to get a little fuzzy (what with all of that wine, and deep tissue massaging) remember, you are in good, professional hands. Rooms start at $136.50 a night, but watching the self-proclaimed wine snob transform into a fluttering butterfly and walking on clouds is priceless.
